HOW OLD WILL I BE IF I DON’T DO THIS NOW?

CupcakeATMWhatever could be better than cuppycakes?

How about my first ever guest poster, and a very special one indeed!  Please welcome artist Anne Belov (a/k/a Bob T. Panda of The Panda Chronicles).

Anne Belov is a wonderful painter and illustrator whose work, both the serious art work and the satirical panda illustrations, brings joy to anyone who views it.  In fact, Anne allowed me to use her painting “Nothing Overlooked” in my February 6, 2014 post.

I can’t wait for Pandamorphosis to be published – just check out the pictures from the book, two of which are being posted here with Anne Belov’s permission. Don’t they make you want your own copy, for yourself, your kids or your grandkids?

Click here to  learn a little about Anne Belov, to view some of her wonderful artwork, and to read about her upcoming book, Pandamorphosis, which will be out later this year (hint, hint):

________________________________________________

 

page 14-15 150 res thumbnail

“Letting Loose the Bears” — Prismacolor pencils on bristol board by Anne Belov

 

 HOW OLD WILL I BE IF I DON’T DO THIS NOW?

By Anne Belov

There is no getting around it. I am (gasp) on the cusp of turning 60, and I’m finding out that it is not as bad or scary as I thought it might be. I’m also finding out that, contrary to popular belief, you can teach an old dog new tricks, or maybe that’s an old panda. I think there is a secret to not feeling old, and it is this:

Learn something new.

We baby boomers are living longer, searching for meaning, and seizing the day until it screams for crying out loud, quit squeezing me so hard. This being the case, it seems to me that the idea of finding your ultimate career in your early 20’s and following that path for the next 60 to 80 years and not doing anything else, ever, just doesn’t seem like …um… a lot of fun.

Just because you love it, it doesn’t mean it isn’t work.

Not even work you love is always going to be fun. I knew from an early age that I wanted to be an artist, and I put my head down, got the bit in my teeth, and said nah-nah-nah I can’t hear you, whenever anyone brought up the practical hardships of living life as a fine artist. Being a self employed artist is harder than you might think and there is no weekly paycheck or overtime pay.

Fine art has supported everything about my life for the last 25 years.

But then the economy crashed in late 2008. You could say I was blindsided by my own success. Because I was doing well, I was not looking for new directions to spread my creative talents. This turned out to be a big mistake, but really, how was I to know? Painting sales are always ebbing and flowing and I convinced myself that one bad year was survivable.

Deciding that I needed something to cheer myself up while I waited out the recession, I started drawing panda cartoons. I won’t go into my pandapiphany here (maybe Cordelia’s Mom will invite me back some other time to tell you about that) but the short version is that I read an article about pandas in China late in 2007, and they started popping out onto paper whenever I picked up a pencil with no destination in mind. In 2009 I started a blog, mostly to see if anyone besides me would laugh at my panda-toons, and so, The Panda Chronicles was born.

I admit to having an obsessive personality.

I read dozens of other cartoonists’ works, books on cartoon theory, and books on visual story telling. All of which lead me to thinking about writing and illustrating picture books. One of the first people I met when I moved to Whidbey Island back in 1989, was Deb Lund, a teacher who writes for children. She encouraged me to think about illustrating children’s books, and 20 years later, I went back to her and said, “Deb, I’m ready!

(I may be obsessive, but I also think a long time about things.) Deb pointed me in the direction of SCBWI (Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators) where I’ve been learning what I needed to know on all aspects of the Kid-Lit book world ever since.

I attended my first regional SCBWI conference in the spring of 2009, and then took a class with Deb later that year. It was in that class that Pandamorphosis had it’s beginning. The road to Pandamorphosis has been long and winding. After taking three years to write/draw it (it is a wordless picture book) I spent another year and a half submitting it and collecting rejections.

Many of the rejections were rather encouraging (if that’s not a complete contradiction) but they were still, in the end, rejections.

I let Pandamorphosis reside in a drawer.

But wait, let’s fast forward to the happy ending! In October of 2013, after attending the Whidbey Island Writers Conference, I decided to put on my big girl panties and find a way to publish Pandamorphosis. Support from my readers and from colleagues in the art world has been gratifying.  The rest will be history.

page 20-21 100 res thumbnail

“Pandas Tumbling Down the Stairs” — Prismacolor pencils on bristol board by Anne Belov

 ***

ADDENDUM:  Recent events around Pandamorphosis have thrown the pandas into a tizzy.  I would tell you the end of the story if I knew it at this time.  Let’s just say, stay tuned for our next exciting chapter.

 ***

Anne Belov indulges her obsession for panda satire on The Panda Chronicles, she also writes regularly for Whidbey Life Magazine, an on-line and print journal of arts and culture, and shows her paintings at The Rob Schouten Gallery in Greenbank WA. Her first book for children, Pandamorphosis will be published sometime in 2014 by Leaping Panda Press, Anne’sown panda-centric publishing venture.  Previously published works include four volumes of the collected cartoons of The Panda Chronicles. Her main regret in life is that there is no MacArthur Foundation Grant in the field of Panda Satire.

 

__________

Cordelia’s Mom loves to her from her readers. You may comment on this post, comment on my Facebook page, or email me at cordeliasmom2012@yahoo.com

__________

Images by:  Rachel Kramer Bussel, and Anne Belov, respectively

Posted in Guest Posters, That's Life | Tagged , , , | 11 Comments

Cooling My Heels in the Auto Service Department

BlueJaguarI’m writing this post while waiting for my car to be inspected, the oil changed, the tires rotated, and having it realigned (damn potholes!).   While waiting, I’m doing a bit of people watching.

***

A gentleman who looks to be in his mid-30s to early 40s just walked in, using a cane.  Why is it that a man using a cane looks debonair, while a woman the same age would simply look decrepit leaning on a cane?

***

I  can immediately spot those customers who have been here since the service department opened this morning.  They’re the ones with multiple empty coffee cups and struggling to appear that they are not, in fact, falling asleep.  How embarrassing would that be?  Just imagine it:

SERVICE ADVISOR:  CookieCakes, your car is done.

[no response from CookieCakes]

SERVICE ADVISOR:  CookieCakes, your car is done.

[no response from Cookie Cakes]

SERVICE ADVISORCookieCakes?

[slight snoring sound]

SERVICE ADVISORCookieCakes, wake up!

***

As I write this, I am working on my second cup of service department coffee, for lack of something better to do.  Not a great idea, considering my ulcerative colitis, but at least it will give me an excuse to get up and walk around without feeling foolish.  I mean, how many times can you go and drool over the new Jaguars in the dealership next door when it’s obvious from your appearance that you can’t afford one without winning the lottery?  [But I bet their coffee is better!]

***

FordBack at my dealership, the service department waiting room has two TV’s, one at each end of the room.  I wouldn’t mind that, except  that each TV is running a different channel, which makes it difficult for me to concentrate on the trashy novel I brought along.  It’s hard enough to read with one TV blaring, but two different ones?

Sure, I could have simply dropped my car off and had the shuttle take me home and then bring me back later, but I’ve used that shuttle service before.  The driver is a really talkative older gentleman who seems to enjoy having an old lady trapped in the front seat of the van.  Thanks, but if I want both my ears talked off, I can simply stay home with the hubby!

***

I’ve been here over an hour now, and no one new seems to be coming in, nor are any of the original customers leaving. Perhaps it’s time to start exchanging names and phone numbers, or perhaps organize a game of poker.  Did anyone even think to bring along a deck of cards?

***

From where I’m sitting, I have a wonderful view of the new tire display.  Be still, my racing heart!

The little fish tank is amusing, though.  It has a model car at the bottom, with the car’s hood open.  I imagine a psych major could spend hours trying to interpret the meaning behind the display.  Why would a new car dealership have a fish tank showing a car under water?

***

Getting bored.  I could walk across the street to the new Ford car lot, but that would only be torturing myself since my current lease isn’t up for another year.  With my last car, I came in for the annual inspection and then found myself driving home in a new vehicle – can’t afford that right now, gotta stay away from that new car lot today!

Usually the coffee stand in the service department has cookies or popcorn, but not today. Not that I’m hungry, but watching the popcorn maker work is something to do, at least.

***

Oh, no.  A young woman just walked in with two very young toddlers in tow, one of which is shrieking and the other has a wet-sounding cough.  Not only am I now fully awake again, but due to my immuno-suppressed status, I need to worry about exposure to some kind of virus.

Whew!  Guess they had a ride waiting, ‘cause they just left, and it’s peaceful again in the waiting room.  (Cordelia’s Mom really is turning into a cranky old lady.)

***

TimeFlies

Yes!  The car is ready!  Only took two hours – although it seemed more like two days.

Who says getting your car serviced is boring?

__________

I love to hear from my readers.  You may comment on this post, comment on my Facebook page, or email me at cordeliasmom2012@yahoo.com

__________

Images by: onkel_wart/Thomas Lieser, and Stefan/dailyinvention, and ruby blossom, respectively.

Posted in Road Trips & Cars, That's Life | Tagged , , , , , | 23 Comments

Oh, Hello, OCD! Now Kindly Piss Off!

While I personally do not have OCD, I know people who do. Mr. Damon describes his episode in a way that grabbed my attention, so I’m re-posting for those of my readers who may also suffer from OCD.

Posted in Re-Blogs, That's Life | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

The Important Room

ImportantRoomEveryone seemed to enjoy my post about cotton balls, which was written in a moment of desperation when I had run out of ideas.

Again searching for ideas, I took another look around my house for likely items to write about.  While spending time in the most important room of the house (hereinafter, “The Important Room”), I noticed the toilet paper roll.

No, this will not be a debate on which way the roll should be hung – that’s been done to a crisp already.  Nor will I stoop low enough to write about the item’s normally intended use – I’m pretty sure every single one of my readers is familiar with that.  Except, of course, for any readers who don’t have indoor plumbing – they’re probably still using newspapers and catalogs, and, of course, it’s unlikely those particular readers would be technically savvy enough to have found this blog.

Or maybe not, judging by some of the spam comments I’ve received.

At any rate, I’ve wracked my pitiful little brain to think of other ways toilet paper (or TP, for those really sophisticated readers) can be used in everyday living.

  • I’ve been known to use a piece of TP as a bookmark if I take a new book into The Important Room but forget to bring a paper or plastic marker.  And I know you’re all thrilled to have me share that with you!
  • Cheap-Chic-Weddings.com and Charmin held a contest for wedding dress designs using:  you guessed it.  The winner walked off with $2,000 – that oughta keep The Important Room stocked for awhile.
  • TPpuppyPuppies love toilet paper.  They love to grab it and then run downstairs and all around the house dragging that playful unrolling paper until it totally runs out.  Fortunately, my new puppy hasn’t discovered The Important Room just yet, but I’m sure it will be just a matter of time.
  • Toilet paper is great for cushioning packages sent to your college student who lives off-campus.  It not only keeps those fresh-baked cookies from crumbling, it can be used for its intended purpose upon arrival (assuming you’ve packed the rolls without unwrapping them first – really, I shouldn’t have to point that out).  Most college students are very appreciative of such consideration – they’ll have that much more cash to pay for beer.
  • Got a neighbor you really hate?  Wait until a dark, rainy night and throw TP at their house.  Rain is a necessary ingredient to make the paper stick properly.  While I’ve heard about this method of socializing, I have never personally participated in the event, although I suspect my house could be a target real soon.
  • If you find yourself moving, either suddenly or otherwise, toilet paper would make good packing material – see above, but without the beer.  Or maybe with the beer after the move is completed and the kids are in bed.
  • How about craft use?  I’m thinking a doggie toy made with toilet paper stuffing might be a good idea.  Too many dogs ingest the cottony type stuffing most toys come with, causing digestive problems.  Toilet paper shreds so well that most dogs would rather do that than eat it, and I’m pretty sure that any small pieces that might be ingested would pass through fairly easily.  Nevertheless, ALWAYS watch your puppy or dog with a new toy.
  • Another crafty use, if you’ve run out of cotton balls, could be snowmen.  Just roll that paper into tight little balls, glue the balls together, add toothpick arms, draw a face with marker, and voilà !  If the paper doesn’t roll into tight enough balls, I hear a little spit might help.

GoogleHad enough?  Of course not.  We haven’t done the requisite internet search yet.

  • Is it really necessary for Wikipedia to define toilet paper?  And in such detail?  Isn’t toilet paper, or TP, a household word already in most civilized societies?
  • There’s even a “Toilet Paper World.”  Seeing the name, I envisioned TP houses (don’t throw water balloons at others if you live in one), or maybe TP cars (if you want it to roll really well, attach it to a puppy), or possibly TP pets (cute little white fluffy kitties – when you get tired of them, just flush them away).

WhiteKitten

It’s a joke, people – I have no issues with cats .    Hold off those nasty emails!

  • And who could possible live with himself or herself if he/she didn’t buy the very best TP, as tested in Consumer Reports?  Not that I personally agree with the results, but there they are.

***

Well, I myself have had enough of this post.  And what with a flare-up of my ulcerative colitis, I need to spend some time in The Important Room now.  Perhaps while I’m in there I’ll spot another item to be featured in a future post.  I know y’all can’t wait!

__________

I love to hear from my readers.   You may comment on this post, comment on my Facebook page, or email me at cordeliasmom2012@yahoo.com

__________

Images by:  Erwin Fisser/fisserman, and Cheng-Yee/chickensdrawl, and Christopher/chriscorneshi, and Helen Haden/hehaden, respectively

Posted in Household Items, Humor, That's Life | Tagged , , , | 21 Comments