I was seduced by an expert.
Knowing there had been a long period of abstinence, the devil started ever so slowly. Just a little wink, a tiny whiff of that intoxicating scent, an alluring whisper. Rumors that others had enjoyed the devil’s offerings and craved more. Rumors that succumbing would result in overall stimulation, flushed cheeks, heightened awareness, tingling in the tummy.
Sometimes the devil offered chocolate or cinnamon, to spice things up. There were hints that whipped cream might be available in the future.
It became harder and harder to resist. Because – chocolate and whipped cream? Tingling?
Yes, I fell for the devil, and I fell hard.
I used to be a “black coffee, no cream, no sugar” kind of gal. At home, I would only use a percolator. No Mr. Coffee for me – I like my brew strong! But, I developed ulcerative colitis, and coffee became a thing of the past.
Then, the Powers That Be installed a Keurig coffee maker in our office kitchen.
Now, every day I would enter the kitchen door and be confronted by that Keurig machine, with its multitude of individually portioned drinks in every flavor imaginable. Every day, I would be accosted by people walking around with heavenly scented cups of coffee, tea, and other hot beverages.
I started with just one (I swear) cup of plain Folgers coffee. After such abstinence, it tasted soooo good. Having been on my Remicade therapy for more than a year, I found I could drink a cup of coffee occasionally with no deleterious effect. The “occasional” cup became a daily cup – sometimes even two cups a day. Still plain, no cream, no sugar – but had I been paying attention, I might have noticed the seducer’s ploy.
Seducers are patient – time is their friend. Addictions develop slowly.
One day, as I filling the water reservoir in the Keurig machine, I glanced over and started reading the various flavors of coffee, tea, etc. available. It was cold outside. I had been running late and snarfed down my half bagel with cream cheese. There, right on the shelf, were Dunkin Donuts Original Blend and Cinnabon Classic Cinnamon Roll K-cups. Donuts? Cinnamon roll? I’m so in! During the day, I had one of each.
The next day, I noticed the Kahlua coffee. Ok, so maybe it doesn’t really have kahlua in it, but we can all pretend, can’t we? Especially after a whole morning and half an afternoon of dealing with ever more demanding clients? Can we also order the Timothy’s Irish Cream K-cups? Please?
From there, it was a predictably slippery slope.
While I never (well, almost never) found myself adding cream or sugar, each day I would treat myself to one or two cups of Keurig coffee. I experimented with different flavors – Green Mountain Wild Blueberry, Green Mountain Pumpkin Spice, Dunkin Donuts Chocolate Glazed Donut. The variety seemed endless.
I occasionally offset the soft addiction with somewhat healthier choices – Celestial Seasonings Mandarin Orange Spice tea or Green Mountain Hot Apple Cider. But the devil continued to entice.
The seduction was not just a one-night stand. It became an obsession.
Are the sleepless nights worth it? Will the affair eventually become boring and simply end? I don’t know, nor do I care. For the time being, I’m simply enjoying the excitement brought into an otherwise routine existence.
Like many before me, I will continue to enjoy the depravity. Like many before me, I may simply walk on the dark side until God Himself calls me home.
My final words may well be,
“Just one more cup, ok?”
Images by Cordelia’s Mom